


A Fangirl's Job

by GStarshine



Category: Ant-Man (Movies), Captain Marvel (2019), Doctor Strange (2016), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Defenders (Marvel TV)
Genre: Civil War Team Ironman, Crack, Crack and Angst, Fangirls, Fangirls protect their favs, He gets a puppy pile, Ironheart, Kidnapping, M/M, Mentor Tony Stark, New Avengers, Not Canon Compliant, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Not Steve Friendly, Not Wanda Friendly, Poor Tony, Post-Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie), Pre-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Rescue, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, and a real team, cause what better mixture?, college kids can be scary, not team Cap friendly, sometimes, sometimes we're soft
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-27
Updated: 2018-09-27
Packaged: 2019-07-17 23:55:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16106411
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GStarshine/pseuds/GStarshine
Summary: Tony has been kidnapped once again, this time to ransom back to the Avengers. He is quick to tell his kidnappers just how little the Avengers care about him. Now the Kidnappers have decided to...keep him?akaAs it was foretold in verse of old, fangirls shall surround their fav in harsh times, a shield against the world until the fav can pull themselves back up and shine again. As it was foretold, so shall it happen.It happens and it was good.





	A Fangirl's Job

**Author's Note:**

> This was supposed to be a one-shot but damn it, I got inspired! Enjoy the angst sprinkled crack my loves!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony has been Kidnapped

When Tony told Pepper that he needed a vacation after the stress of the whole Ultron fiasco this was not what he meant.

Tony shifted in the chair he was cuffed to, looking around to try and figure out something about his surroundings but all he could pinpoint was that he was in some sort of bunker, military or doomsday perhaps. The little room he was in was completely bare, with only a door behind him. Whoever his kidnappers were, they were smart enough not to give him any tools. All he could do was sit and wait for an opportunity.

It didn't take long for his kidnapper to arrive, the door barely making any sound as it opened to admit the figure.

"Aw, come on." Tony huffed as the figure came into view, "Hooded cloak? A little cliche isn't it?"

The figure crossed its arms over its chest, "A necessary cliche I'm afraid, Mr. Stark."

Tony snorted, "As well as the voice changer, huh?" the engineer leaned back in his chair akwardly to avoid crushing his cuffed hands, "Let's get the rest of this out of the way then shall we? 'You're going to build us weapons Stark.'" Tony mocked in a 'scary voice', "No, no I'm not. 'We'll torture you if you don't.' Survived three months of it, doubt you'll make me break. So how about you just let me go and you can leave without being exploded in an enormous fireball. Sound good?"

The figure was silent for a moment and Tony just raised an eyebrow at it, "We didn't bring you here to build weapons for us, Mr. Stark. And we're not going to torture you." despite the voice changer, this was said a bit slower, a bit kinder.

Tony's second eyebrow joined the first to show his disbelief, "Right... Well, Stark Industries has a no-ransom policy."

"Oh, we don't plan to ransom you back to your company Mr. Stark." the cloaked figure chuckled, "We're going to ransom you back to your team. The Avengers."

Tony stared at the figure in silent disbelief before he snorted, his snorts soon descended into full-on laughter. "Oh my god! Ransom me to-" hysterical giggles escaped his mouth.

"Mr. Stark-" the figure began sternly.

"No, no!" Tony laughed, "I can't! Just-" another fit of laughter had him hunching over in his seat. "Ransom me to the Avengers.," he laughed, "Priceless."

"Mr. Stark." the figure began again, this time talking over the man, "I hardly see this as a laughing matter. Without you, their tech guy, they will be unable to track us here through satellite or reverse hack. But you are a member of their team, an integral part of the group, they will pay to have you returned to them."

Tony had another short fit of laughter before he leveled the figure with an amused look, "Hate to break it to you, but no they won't. They won't pay to have me back. Hell, I doubt they would even use the technology of mine you left behind to track me down."

"But...you're a beloved member of their team." the figure said haltingly.

"No, I'm not." Tony scoffed, "Never really was." 

"But..."

"Listen," Tony huffed, "It's nice to know that's how the public sees us but let me give you the real run down so you can stop wasting my time and yours." he shifted a little in his chair to try and get comfortable, "I first learned about the Avengers right after the attack at the Stark Expo. I had been dying due to palladium poisoning and behaving really erratically during that time. My now teammate, Romanoff, was assigned to me by Sheild. She was supposed to do a personality profile on me, to see if I would be good for the Avengers. Do you know what she said after going undercover and shadowing me for a few of the worst weeks of my poisoning? Ironman: yes, Tony Stark: Not recommended. Whatever, I was made a consultant. Then the invasion in New York came up and suddenly I was allowed on the team because 'this isn't about personality profiles anymore'. Basically, 'we'd rather not but shit is going down and we need Ironman, you'll have to do'. So I went."

"There I met up with the rest of my new team." Tony continued, "Real rocky start with Thor and Cap, basically got into a schoolyard brawl over Loki. Barton was in the wind but I truly met Banner, Rogers, Romanoff, and Thor for the first time on the original helicarrier. None of us fit together as a team. We were used to running our own shows. We fought among ourselves. Within six hours of meeting me, Rogers told me I was nothing without my suit, told me that he knew guys worth ten of me. He judged my worth without even really knowing me." Tony blew out a breath, his eyes gazing at the wall behind the figure a little too deeply. "Then we came together in a moment when the whole world needed us. We stood our ground against the alien invasion and I directed the nuke meant for New York into the portal to stop them completely."

"Then, we went our separate ways. I tried to keep the team together, offer the Tower for a base and even began to prepare upgrades for the team so they would have the best, to keep them safe on the field. No one stayed. I was accused of trying to buy friends by Hawkeye and Widow made some comments about my ego. Thor left for Asgard and Bruce only stayed a short time to play in the lab before running off to Calcutta" Tony rolled his eyes, "So I put them on the backburner. I took care of the Mandarin all by myself, didn't call them and didn't receive a call in return, even after the fact to see what happened or if I was okay. Then Sheild fell, Cap and Widow took care of that. They pulled in Sam Wilson, who I guess Steve met jogging a couple times? They didn't call me for help. Not when the three helicarriers fell on the poor unsuspecting civilians who were near the Potomac River that day. Not when the Widow dumped all the classified information on the internet. I was alerted to things as they happened, not by my so-called team members, but by my AI who helped me lead extraction missions for burned innocent agents who had no clue what was going on."

"After that, Rogers, Romanoff, and Wilson showed up at the Tower, apparently ready to take the home I offered before. They used it as an HQ more than anything, basing missions out of there. They accepted room and board, upgrades, and an expense account from me, all without a thank you. They rarely spoke to me unless a mission was big enough to warrant Ironman or they needed something, their gear fix or an upgrade. Thor, Banner, and Barton eventually joined us at the Tower after seeing that the others had come." Tony sighed, "Nothing really changed, I had Banner to hang out with but the others still only engaged with me if they wanted something. The Ultron happened."

"We had found an active Hyrda base large enough to warrant the entire team, they had taken Loki's scepter in the scramble when Sheild fell. So we attacked the base. When everyone else was fighting, I went inside to try and find the scepter. When I found it, it...I don't know, triggered my PTSD? Something. When I saw the scepter, I had a terrible vision. I got myself out of it and took the scepter with me when I flew out. That vision stayed with me though and I..." Tony sighed once again, this one heavier, "I wanted to make something to protect the world. I began to study the scepter with Banner while also writing a new AI/Peacekeeping program, the Ultron Program. The program was nowhere near ready for initialization when it was hijacked by some sort of consciousness from the stone in Loki's scepter. It took over one of the bodies of the Iron Legion and managed to escape. Everything went really fast after that. I was lifted off the ground by my neck by Thor and no one said anything, that should tell you how much the team likes me right there. Then we tracked Ultron, the Hulk was let loose on Johannesburg by Maximoff, I had to call down the Hulkbuster, The Maximoff siblings switched sides, Ultron turned Sokovia into a damn meteor, we stopped him."

"Now, after the dust has settled, I see how the land lies with my team and with most of the world. I'm soley blamed by the world for Ultron even though there was interference from an alien staff. Banner ran off, leaving me to try and explain things without someone else to back me up. The rest of the Avengers are living it up in the compound I made for them but they've shunned me even more than before. Wanda Maximoff was allowed onto the team even though she stated plainly that she hated me and originally joined Hydra to get rid of me, a point of view she has no trouble reminding me that she still holds. I'm constantly called selfish and egotistical no matter how hard I try to change for these people. They are basically just using me for my money and that's a super toxic relationship to be i-" Tony stopped, "Huh." he looked up at the cloaked figure who was standing frozen in shock and disbelief. "You know what? You're pretty easy to talk to. I must have really needed to get this stuff off my chest."

"Mr. Stark..." the figure whispered painfully.

Tony rolled his eyes, "I just spilled my guts right into a breakthrough with you, I think you can call me Tony." he shrugged, "Still won't get you your ransom money, sorry. As you've heard, The Avengers' have proven over and over that they don't want me. They still have access to all my money and equipment so they won't feel any need to rescue me and they certainly won't pay to get me back. You're better off just letting me go. I won't even press charges. This little vent session can be your repayment for kidnapping me."

The cloaked figure remained still for several tense moments before it swept toward Tony and thin but strong feeling arms wrapped around his shoulders.

"What th-"

"It's okay Mr. Stark." the cloaked figure sniffled in his ear, clearly starting to cry, "I won't hurt you, I just...you seem like you really need a hug."

Tony blinked but smiled and hooked his chin over the figure's shoulder, "It is nice. I usually only get hugs when Rhodey is on leave or Pepper has a spare moment."

The cloaked figure squeeze him tighter and then stepped back, "Just wait right here Mr. Stark, I have to go talk to the others."

"Others?" Tony asked in alarm, but the figure was already out the door.

The genius slumped in his chair, ready to wait once more. 

* * *

 

It was a whole hour before the door was opened again, this time letting in three cloaked figures. 

"Hello, Mr. Stark." the three chorused, voices feminine and unhampered by voice changers.

"Hello," he replied warily.

"Sorry about this." one of the figures to the left said as they pulled out a strip of cloth which was held out toward him, "We need to gag you but we don't want to hurt you. So just let me know if it's too tight, alright?"

Tony frowned, "I already said you wouldn't be getting a ransom for me. From Stark Industries or from the Avengers."

"It's not about money anymore." A shorter figure to the right said, "This is about you now."

The genius opened his mouth before snapping it closed again and frowning, "How exactly does that translate to gagging me?"

"We'll explain everything once we're done Mr. Stark." the tallest of the figures said, "You won't be hurt. We promise."

Tony narrowed his eyes but finally huffed, "Fine, but just because this is the strangest kidnapping I've ever had and I want to see where it goes."

"We'll try not to disappoint you Mr. Stark." the first chirped excitedly, gently putting the gag into Tony's mouth and tying it behind his head, "Too tight?" Tony shook his head, "Good, now you'll need to stand up. We'll help you not fall."

They led him out of the smaller room and into the larger part of the bunker. It was a long hall sectioned off into two parts. 

The closest part was decorated to look like a very stereotypical ransom video set. A camera was set on a tripod next to a table where yet another cloaked person sat typing at a computer. Across from that was a single chair in front of a bedsheet that was hung from the ceiling. On the sheet was 'T.S.D.S.' written in still wet paint.

The other half of the hall looked like a college dorm on steroids. Seven piles of blankets and pillows were set up in a large ring around a low coffee table that held a boatload of unhealthy snacks and sugary drinks. Each of little blanket nests had at least one computer (four had two laptops) and a phone; Tony happily noted that they were all Stark products, so at least his kidnappers had good tastes. On one of the bunker walls was a large flat screen TV that was hooked up to a stereos system, two different gaming systems, and a cable box. Two of the blanket nests were occupied with two college-aged girls who were glued to their phones, both typing furiously with serious expressions on their faces. Both seemed to have red-rimmed eyes like they had been crying recently.

"Right here, Mr. Stark." one of the cloaked figures said, gesturing him to the chair in front of the bed sheet. The cloaked person's words caused the two girls to look up and their eyes to widen at the sight of him, they both hurried over to stand behind the camera and the cloaked person sitting at the table.

The cloaked figure sitting at the computer looked up and, by the sound of it, almost choked at the sight of Tony. "Mr. Stark!" they squeaked, jolting to their feet and almost sending their computer flying. They stumbled around the table, thrusting a hand out in front of them, "It's such an honor to meet you! I'm one of your biggest fans and..." the cloaked person stopped when Tony raised an eyebrow at the extended hand. "Oh, right." they brought their hand up to rub at the back of their neck sheepishly, "I didn't even think about...sorry."

One of the girls behind the camera snickered, "Calm down Riri, we'll uncuff and ungag him once we're done. Then you can fangirl."

"Shut up, Cana!" the newly identified Riri hissed. Tony was sure that if the cloak was gone, the person underneath would be blushing.

Just then, another cloaked figure swept in from the opposite side of the bunker, "Riri, are we ready?" the voice changer told Tony that this was the first kidnapper he met, the one that hugged him. "Chinese should be here in forty and I want to finish the video before that."

"We're just waiting for go time." Riri reported, hurrying back to the computer and sitting down again, "I've hacked the Avengers Twitter page and set up a live stream, with current traffic we should have a few thousand within the first thirty seconds of video."

"Good." the apparent leader said, "Let's get started then."

The three who had taken Tony from the room, settled in a semicircle behind his chair while the leader stood in between him and the camera. The two without cloaks on both held their phones at the ready, presumably to monitor the Twitter feed as soon as things went up. Riri held up a delicate dark-skinned hand with three fingers up before starting a countdown. A red light appeared on the camera as Riri hit one and gave the leader a thumbs up.

"Hello, people of the world. I come to you today to expose some truths about the Avengers. Truths about how the Avengers are run. Truths about how certain members are treated. Truths about bullying and downright assholery that go on within the ranks of those we look to for protection. I think we are entitled to these truths, especially when these truths reveal things about the character of the heroes we look up to." the leader began strongly, "Now, as you can see, I am not an Avenger. Luckily, I have one here with me." she stepped aside to reveal the cuffed and gagged Tony Stark.

As if on cue, the two uncloaked girls started typing on their phones, most likely commenting on the live video.

"I'm not going to lie. We kidnapped Tony Stark with the intention of ransoming him back to the Avengers. But when I spoke to Mr. Stark, I found out the terrible truth. As much as this will break Mr. Stark's trust, we have put up video of his confession on Youtube and have linked it in this post." Tony's frowned around his gag and tossed the leader a half-hearted glare, he didn't really mind it being out there, but he would have liked to decide his next actions before his little breakthrough was shared. "In the video, Mr. Stark describes his treatment by his teammates. How they've used him. How they've taken him for granted and bullied him. We won't stand for it!" the leader declared, Tony raised his eyebrows.

"We won't stand for it." the leader repeated, "Mr. Stark is our hero! Ironman is our hero! The world's hero! He saved New York from being nuked! He saved the president of the United States from the Maderin, stopping further bombings! He cleaned up his weapons when he realized his business partner was double-dealing! He invented cheap, clean energy that is bringing third world countries out of the stone age! He is constantly moving the world forward with his technology and his philanthropy. He inspires millions to do better every day! He inspired us!" the leader crossed their arms over their chest, "So when we found out how our hero was treated by his so-called teammates, we decided."

"We may have started out wanting to ransom Mr. Stark back to a team we believed cared for him. But since that is not the case, we decided that the Avengers can't have him back!" the leader declared.

"Wha!" Tony scoffed around the gag, his eyes were already wide at the cloaked leader's rant calling him their hero but this?

The three cloaked figures behind Tony came around to stand protectively in front of the wide-eyed and truly shocked man, "We are the Tony Stark Defense Squad!" the leader proclaimed, "Since no one else will defend our hero, we will! We won't release him to a group of freeloader bullies! You don't want to appreciate, Tony Stark? Then you can't have him!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uhoh, here we go! Let's have some fun, shall we?
> 
> Also, real talk, I don't know how fast popular accounts get people to view their live streams the when they start it up. I assume pretty fast if people have alerts on but I have no basis for that. I've never caught the live stream of someone super famous and I couldn't find any analytics that told me about it either. But for this I kinda assumed that since the Avengers account would be a popular one, lots of people would have alerts for it and would take the time to watch a live stream from them. I'm not really a twitter person but I think its more popular than Facebook these days. At least for this kind of thing.
> 
> An imaginary cookie and this digital hi-five for anyone who can guess what they needed the ransom money for. Lol
> 
> As a reminder, this is pre-Civil War.
> 
> Next up, Chapter 2: Reactions

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and Comments if you enjoyed!
> 
> Flames will be used to make me dinner!


End file.
